Saturday, October 20, 2012

Politically Incorrect Parenting

On Deb's recommendation, I'm reading Nigel Latta's book 'Politically Incorrect Parenting'. 

No author and reader will ever totally agree on parenting philosophy, and as a non-Christian he obviously misses the whole issue of sin and grace in parenting, but a lot of the book is just pure gold. 

Here's my favourite bit so far, which describes his psychology session with an 8 year old who won't sleep in his own bed, and his parents: (transcribed without permission from pages 98-99)

'What do you enjoy most in the whole world, Jordan?' I asked.
Because he had no idea that he was setting himself up, he simply told me. 'Soccer.'
'You like that the most?'
He nodded. 'Soccer is really cool.' 
I could see it in his eyes - this boy was mad passionate about the game. 
'OK,' I said, turning to his parents. 'When would you like him sleeping in his own bed?' I asked it using a tone which said that this would be no problem at all - they just had to choose the night. I used this tone for two reasons: first, to instil some confidence in both them and their son, and, second, because it was true.
They looked at each other, before Petra said, somewhat hesitantly: 'As soon as possible.' 
'Tonight?' 
She smiled as if she wasn't sure I was serious. 'If that's possible.' 
I turned back to Jordan. 'How much do you like soccer again?' 
This time he answered a little less certainly, because, being a very bright young man, Jordan had tumbled my game before his parents had. 'Umm... quite a bit.' 
I laughed. 'You're a smart kid, Jordan. What do you think I'm going to tell your mum and dad to do?' 
He gave me a conflicted frown, because he was pleased with himself for figuring it out, but in the same breath absolutely opposed to the idea. 'That I can't go to soccer unless I stay in bed?' 
I smiled broadly. I liked this boy a lot. 'Bingo.'


3 comments:

  1. I'm reading it too :) There are plenty of memorable quotes, aren't there?

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  2. He's certainly got the gift of the gab. I wish I could have said some of these things to my clients...

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  3. I love the Faulty-Tower-ish bit where he describes what he would say if he met himself as a young specialist giving out helpful advice on consistency. That cracked me up!

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